Archive for the ‘food’ Category

The Secret Life of Hidden Disabilities

March 5, 2017

book-official

My book gives a voice to those of us who are living with hidden disabilities, and the discrimination we face whether with, or without the use of a service dog. It seems to have been an unspoken subject. Have you ever gotten out of your car because you parked in a handicap space and you don’t look disabled? Maybe even chased down while someone is yelling at you because they assume you are abusing the handicap space? Have you ever gone to ER to find an ER nurse is hunting you down because you don’t look disabled enough to have a service dog by your side? Some places ask for papers regarding the service dog, and my city doesn’t issue papers. Have you ever gone out to a restaurant only to be harassed by the people sitting near because you don’t look disabled enough to have a service dog. Maybe denied service because they don’t think you are disabled enough to have a service dog. Have patrons ever chased you down in a store because they would like know why you have the dog? Only to be told, “You are not disabled.” This book may open your eyes and hearts for those living with hidden disabilities. My hope is to educate those people around us; so that people living with hidden disabilities don’t have to endure discrimination and can live in peace among-st a sometimes tough world.

By Kimberly Harms Ryan

Woof!

San Diego State Disable Student Services

March 19, 2016

 

I had to go to SDSU today for my taxes. I am sick and detoxing from my health and surgery. Talk about double duty and not feeling well. Everyone helping with my taxes at the Love Library was super compassionate towards me not feeling well and having to assist me with help.

 

I found a great parking spot off Hardy ave. then had to walk through the center of SDSU to the Love Library for my taxes. As I am trying to fill out papers my mind is struggling to focus as I was shaking. I manage to hold myself up barely. Before I go, I inquired about help getting to my car because the stabbing pain in my stomach was more than I could bare.

 

I call the campus security they don’t help people to cars unless night time. I inquire about other options as I am disabled and they gave me the number to Disabled Services. I call and got a very unkind woman / receptionist I presume.

 

I said I am disabled person on campus and need a ride to my car because I am struggling with my health. She says, “We don’t drive people to their cars” I said, “I just need to get close enough to get to my car.” She then hits me with, “How did you get their!?” I am thinking “Really, who talks to a disabled person like this?” A few long minutes go by and see a van go by. I  called back thought they missed me. Called again as I could hardly stand or sit, so then the Disabled Service receptionist scolded me on the phone for calling back.

 

The two men who picked me up in a cart where kind and got me to the very edge of campus grounds and I could see me car….

 

San Diego State Disabled Services will be getting a call on Monday from The Hayliegh Project regarding the hostile treatment towards me as a disabled person. Thoughts what about the other disabled people who call and need help. What about compassion and empathy for people who are disabled?

 

People’s behavior are not a reflection me it is a reflection of themselves. Problem the reflection wounded a hurt woman today and that was me. .

 

I don’t need to hear, “She may have had a bad day” I had a horrific day and didn’t miss treat anyone for my health issues.

Chloe’s world

August 9, 2014

Big day for Chloe she went to Solid Gold. I think the visit is equivalent to an amusement park for people. Vest off and she is in full puppy form at Solid Gold. She grumbles as she jumps out the car door. Chloe queen of the rock!

My happy store! WOOF!

My happy store! WOOF!

Severe Pain suffering

March 4, 2014

Here it comes and God help me! Chloe is really doing her job even though I hurt I try to get out as best as I can. Chloe is grounding 100% because she doesn’t want me to walk. Good girl Chloe!

What do I do? I have endured insane pain since the middle of Feb  2014 the original pain triggered end of Jan, 2014. It is “Trying my soul” both physically, emotionally and spiritually. My spirituality is so important to me and all I can do is hang on to the belief that God is with me since I spiritually beat. To beat to pound on Gods door. My sanity has turned into a Sunami and I don’t know how to save myself.

I have been on the muscle relaxers the pain killers, and tried meds that added more pain like headaches. I would like my simple life back. My simple life would “Beg to differ” by most as it comes with managing pain, and fatigue that leaves a person paralyzed.

I know how to do Fibromyalgia and CFID, but add this and it is spiritual insanity and physically a living death.

It is the day after my injection not thinking of anything but positive thoughts about the medical treatment became a huge let down. I tried to walk a half a block per request to take it easy and not push by my PA. I am in excruciating pain and disappointed with my self. Along with this lack of exercise is the food that I eat and how to stay healthy with my weight because I am not able to move. I have chosen my Chronic Fatigue Immune Disease (CFID) plan no carbohydrates except air popped popcorn, veggies, legumes, and lean protein. It is a strict discipline, but a good one.

I am calling doc tomorrow to let him know that I am not doing well. “More shall be revealed!”

Finally no more crutches!

Finally no more crutches!

Finally doc appointment today. The last seven days have felt like a month of nauseating and excruciating back pain of suffering. This also meant it was a time for Chloe’s training out and about at the doctors today.

Chloe is a one year old puppy this month and still in her training years. Training a pup takes consistency both physically and mentally it is a twenty-four seven job and I am the one to do it!

Our visit at the doc went well. Chloe felt the need to stray away when people would make comments about her because she knows when people are talking about her, smart cookie! This is normal behavior for a service dog in training. Keeping their is crucial. In the patient room she was put in “Down” command which is hard for any pup for any period of time. She stayed down until the PA came in. She got up to greet him and then I had to direct her to “Down” command. She became startled when the PA started to work on my back as she already is watching over me. Chloe was put back into “Down” command. My teacher said I always “Win” which means my diligence has to supersede any thought of throwing my hands up in the air.

My Physician Assistant (PA) Mike is fabulous and is always up and on it when it comes to my healthcare. He has been treating this nerve condition for a few years now. It is now become more prevalent. He said that I need to keep the inflammation down. The mode of action is first a shot of cortisone in arm that will go all over to help with the nerve pain, topical compound cream for the area in question, muscle relaxer and pain pills to keep the inflammation down if needed. The shot should help for the next few days and then repeat the shot if needed. If this continues then we will restructure my care. This means being sent to a specialist to have the nerves in my spine treated to stop the pain.

My PA knows how important it is to keep my core strong and he know that my Pilates Machine is important to my health care. He was supportive in the fact that if I cannot do the Pilates Machine then I will be in more trouble than I am now.

I shared with my PA that me world is narrowing and he reminded me that I do a lot of good stuff for someone suffering with this disease and wants me to keep my goals going as it gives me life and a sense of “Importance” and “Contribution” to the world.

Looking forward to a new day tomorrow. WOOF!

Chloe’s World

June 30, 2013

Hard at work.

Today is our 3rd day on our road trip. We met Art at Calloway and then off to Europa , Ponte, Miramonte and then end at south coast. Chloe and I took off is to the Ramada in Old Town Temecula, ca. We went back to our new fav mex food.  It is good to return to my little heaven on earth. Woof!

 

Image

Yesterday woke up started walking and I had this weird sensation in the front of my left thigh it felt as though my leg was going to give out. I then went to help my senior friend and stepped on my left foot and boom the spasm hit in the left lower spine. I took pain medications and they didn’t work so I went to muscle relaxers and my pain subsided enough to get some relief. I have had this repeating for the last yr and becoming more prevalent.

                                                                                                              

 This morning Chloe and I had to go out to take care of matters that had to be done. My pain became so bad that Chloe lied down on the ground and didn’t want to move. How did she know? I am upset as I wanted to work out hang with friends and I am not able to. 

 I can look at the glass half full and not half empty, so with that said I will chose the glass have full. I can watch great movies, through a ball for Chloe and hang out with her, type on the internet and surrender to what is. Most of all I can remember that God is with me.

I am amazed at the awareness at how dogs can sense and know what is happening. After having Hayliegh as my service dog and learning to identify certain behaviors matching the onset of what is happening to my body. Today Chloe knew my body was in extreme pain and she lied down and didn’t want me to move.  She is happy that I am home.

 

 

Hayliegh’s World

November 25, 2012

Relationships

Hayliegh knows the difference between the different levels of relationship that we have.  There are various relationships when we are in the “out shopping mode.” She knows to remain by my side until given permission to greet people. When we run into casual friends, she knows she can say hello after I’ve greeted them. On the days I am not well, she will greet them and then come right back to me.

You might be asking when you see me, “Why does she need a dog?”  I am rolling into a very fit fifty, I have honey blond hair, I eat well and stay as fit as I can.  Not an easy task considering this disease is 24/7. I value the benefits of working out as I have been working out since I was thirteen years of age.  It has an important part of my way of life.

We also have our “gym mode.”   Even though she is working for me, I allow her to say hi to everyone, as they are considered regular friends that we see all the time. Saying hello is part of her treats, so I let her enjoy herself while we’re there. She always makes me her priority, despite her outgoing personality.  One day at the gym a friend said “Do you notice how she isn’t as friendly when the Fibromyalgia is flaring in your back?” I realized that was true. I also discovered that her behavior reverts to her usual friendly demeanor once my medications kick in.  Another time, she refused to be social with any of our close friends at the gym. She stood near my side looking forward in a worried manner. Jennifer, a staff member ask “Kim are you feeling okay?” I told her I felt fine. She said “Either you need to go home or we’re going to have an earthquake, because I’ve never seen Hayliegh act like this.” I decided to listen to Hayliegh’s intuition and drive home. She couldn’t have walked any faster to get me to the car.  She wouldn’t even take her treats that she likes before we got going. Well when I got home within forty minutes, I was doubled over with acute stomach pain and could not walk.     

When we visit the doctor we are in “doctor mode.”  She likes to greet the nurses, staff and the doctors; they all enjoy her and it puts a smile on all their faces. I think it helps her feel safe when they work on me. My doctors are amazed, when she reacts to them working on me. For instance, when they give me a shot, she will get up and have to watch over me.

When I have a CAT scan or any other test where she can’t see my face, she starts to whimper or make a low cry. If I end up in an ambulance the medical techs ask “Can she come with us?” and I say “Yes” and then the medical tech will say “yes too.” We had a cute moment when an ambulance came to pick me up. One tech thought she was so cute, he asked if he could take a photo of her in the ambulance; I couldn’t help but say yes. You should see when I am admitted to the ER facility. By the time I get to the area that is curtained off, the word has spread through the whole ER floor that the cutest service dog was there with me. It is funny how one person after another cruised by to say hi to Hayliegh. Can you imagine?  I am at the hospital, the techs are hooking me up with needles and wires, and Hayliegh is on the floor and she is getting really upset as she cannot see my face. The nurses usually put her on the bed with me so she can calm down.

One time the doctor thought I had a ruptured appendicitis.  My thoughts raced; what do I do? I have Hayliegh it is now past her dinner time, she wouldn’t have any of her food, and who would take her out? Suddenly the Chaplain shows up; she had to come and see the cute dog hanging out in the ER room.  Back to the food and potty breaks.  The Chaplin offered to take Hayliegh out as she would be on duty all night for patients.  One of the nurses asks if they could bring Hayliegh something form the kitchen? I said “Oh she would be so happy,” so they brought her a bowl of rice with meatloaf since it was on the menu. The nurses and the kitchen agreed if I had to stay the night they would put rice and chicken in the refrigerator they keep on the floor. Wasn’t that nice?

Hayliegh’s World

November 4, 2012

       

My steadfast companion.

                                               

                                 Hayliegh Is Working

I can hardly believe it Hayliegh is still by side and takes her job seriously. Over the years I started to notice behaviors associated with my condition.  She instinctively knows, before I do, if a migraine is going to hit. She won’t let me out the front door if I need medication. She knows when my fibromyalgia is affecting my back; she will stand between me and others to protect my back until my medication has kicked in. While out and about when fibromyalgia is already flared up, she does a look by facing forward then turning back to me. Then she stands right near me and looks away from people, as if to say “I am working right now.”  If my stomach is going to be attacked while I am out in public, she will become stubborn and unruly, and by this I understand she is telling me we have to leave. If I stay and don’t listen to her I end up on the floor or doubled over in pain.  I have to get medication in me right away because my stomach starts with acute and severe pain.  One time she even showed my therapist that I had a severe back injury. She dragged her back legs into the patient room when we went in to talk.  We both looked at each other and asked “Did you see that!” because Hayliegh mimicked my injury.

Hayliegh’s World

February 19, 2012

“I’m tired of doing the time for someone else’s crime”

 Denied My “Civil Rights” under the ADA

Two reasons why I am not able to find legal help is:

I don’t look disabled: again having hidden disabilities / invisible disabilities comes to haunt me again 1. Because I don’t look disabled  &  2. The fact that I have gone after a company for denying me my “civil rights” under the ADA years past. It isn’t fair I did not commit a crime. I am tired and angry that this is happening and I still have no rights.

It is a sin that people w/ invisible disabilities / hidden disabilities cannot find legal help because we don’t look disabled enough for a trial thus a jury. Isn’t that discrimination too? The case isn’t whether I am disable the case would be that “I was denied my civil rights under the ADA and UNRUH Act to have my service dog. I live in disabled housing because I am disabled w/ multiple disabling health issues such as, Fibromyalgia, CFID’s/ME, IBS, and the list goes on. This January I will have a total of seven doctor appointments just this month most people don’t go except once or twice a year.

I am asked by attorney’s am I in a “wheelchair” and when I say no that about ends it because again “I DON”T LOOK DISABLED.”  This also raises the question that wheelchair people are more believable then me and then I am discriminated against again.

Is it fair that I get denied the legal help that I deserve by law. Check: California civil code 52 and ADA and Unruh civil rights act 54 and 55.2

What price have you put on your “CIVIL RIGHTS!”

On January, 7, 2012

My friend and I walked into a restaurant (Old Venice) and seated ourselves at the bar on the stools.  I shared w/ the bartender that I had service dog w/ me and showed him my dogs vest because the buckle had broken. The bartender then left and returned to  the patron side of the to talk to us. He then said we have to leave because of my service dog. He also shared that the owners did not allow service dogs in their restaurant.

I then repeated to the bartender “oh you don’t understand this is my service dog and legally we are allowed by law to be here.” I shared that we had been h before. He got frustrated and a bit heated, and was a matter of fact about the rules and service dogs. He said he had spoken to the owners and service dogs were not allowed in the restaurant. The bartender informed us that a customer came in w/ a little dog claiming it was her service dog and she was asked to leave. .

I asked the bartend his name “Justin” and the time 6:05pm We left and went to my friend’s apartment to call the police. Officer Stadler #3980 and Lopez showed up took the info and went to the restaurant to share w/ Justin abut service dogs then returned to my friend’s apartment and shared that Justin the bartender did say “the owners don’t allow service dogs.

It has been a hard couple of days and I am hoping to be coming out of the insanity I was feeling about the discrimination and my service dog. I am bummed out. I have felt sick and depressed about this.

I now fear being rejected by other attorneys because I don’t look disabled.

* The ADA laws

* Hayliegh’s tags and licensing copied.

* I have a witness

* There was an police officer involved and witnessed the violation  

   under ADA laws. 

Witnesses statement

To whom it may concern:

This is my statement of the event that took place at 6:05 p.m. on Saturday, January 7th, 2012.

Kimberly Ryan Harms, her service dog Hailey and myself Deanne Coleman – A restaurant in San Diego.

We walked into the restaurant and seated ourselves at the bar on the stools.  Kimberly also motioned to and mentioned her service dog and showed the man the vest upon walking into the building.  The bartender then left for a few minutes towards the back.  When the bar tender returned he walked over to where we were seated and proceeded to state strongly that we would have to leave since service dogs were not allowed in the establishment per management / owner requirements.

Kimberly then said oh you don’t understand this is my service dog and legally we are allowed by law to be served here.  She said we have been served here before as well.  She pulled the vest out again to show the bartender.  He then more aggressively stated that no, it does not matter we are not allowed to be served here with the service dog.

He said he had just called the owners on the phone who again had told him dogs were not allowed in the restaurant even if it’s a service dog.  The bar tender said last week they had someone else in here with a dog and they were requested to leave as well.  He said it’s not himself telling her no, but the owners rules and request.

Kimberly then asked him what time it was and asked for his name.  He said it’s 6:05 p.m. and my name is Justin.  We then left and went back to her friend’s home to call the Police.  The policeman came out to the home and took Kimberly’s statement and stated also that is discrimination for customers with service dogs to not be allowed in or be served at a restaurant.

  • San Diego police officer Stadler and Lopez involved. The bartender told the police officer that I was not allowed w/ my service dog due to owners policy.

I called the restaurant to make a complaint on January 20, 2012 @ 5:35pm and spoke to manager Forrest to talk about my discomfort and being upset about what happened about the night in question. He kind of wanted to brush me off and then said the owners would call me and they never did.


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